Which "Other City" Should You Live In?

Congratulations on your decision to relocate yourself and your family to one of our beautiful and convenient rental properties in the Other Cities. Now the decision awaits: where? This questionnaire should help guide you in your choice!

  1. I will be looking for work as a:
    tragical poet
    part-time opera sales manager, part-time nomadic tribesperson

  2. During my leisure time, I enjoy:
    playing "The Sims"
    skeet shooting
    dueling and gambling by the river
    vacuuming my face
    grumbling and being unpleasant
    going for a swim

  3. An ideal dinner for me would consist of:
    unripe raw olives
    Gallo wine, baked beans, and hot dog chunks
    Scones and biscotti
    Hallucinogenic mushrooms
    revenge, served cold
    I am tired of all the kinds of dinners I know about

  4. My preferred pet is (please note, pets are not allowed in some of our rental properties; please check with your superintendent):
    flying, human-devouring behemoth

  5. The governmental system I prefer living under is:
    post-communist kleptocracy
    sacrificial philosopher-king
    bourgeois erotopia
    should be settable from a pull-down menu
    I despise all the governmental forms that I know about

  6. Features that are important to me in a city include:
    water beds
    frequent natural disasters
    book binderies growing out of the ground
    a very sensitive AI
    drug-induced sexual euphoria

  7. I believe that the root of all suffering is:
    the accumulation of surplus
    high expectations
    lack of good advice

Thank you for choosing the Other Cities Lifestyle Communities! We look forward to living with you!